Depression

For as long as I can remember

there’s been this friend of the family,

But it’s only in recent years that

he’s shown a special interest in me.

He’s not a ‘friend’ at all of course

and I’m sorry if this sounds disturbing,

But only in talking so openly I think,

he can be stopped from lurking.

We nickname him

"Bit blue"

"Bit sad"

"Bit tired"

because "Depression" sounds so formal,

And to admit he’s in our midst

would be to admit we’re out of control.

We do get rid of him

but then in

a moment of stress or tiredness,

We’re not able to rule our emotions and

he takes advantage of our weakness.

He won’t let me get out of bed,

wash,

dress,

eat.

He takes my motivation.

I’m a prisoner in my own home

and he has me in isolation.

Because tears prick behind my eyes

ready to fall at a "are you ok?"

So even though I could do with a friend

I hide myself away.

I do try to shrug him off

snap myself out of it

pull my socks up.

But maybe it’s chemical or spiritual

because I’m not able to perk myself up.

He’s been plaguing my family for so long,

God’s the only answer

Only he can break down the door,

break the hold

and give him a restraining order.

He sent in his best God-man

to deal with him violently

To dry my tears and clothe me with strength

To rescue and set me free.

‘Depression’ isn’t allowed near me anymore,

He pushes his luck occasionally,

But I don’t fight on my own and I know that one day

God will deal with him permanently.